Grateful

I'm writing along with 5 minute Friday and the Gypsy Mama this morning.  Visit www.thegypsymama.com or click the link to join the fun.
Here go my 5 minutes on "Grateful"

I'm grateful for:-

fresh starts
crunching gravel underfoot
laughter
lazy afternoons filled with a dad teaching son how to fish
hugs for a teary friend
church family, when blood family is on distant shores
stir up the gift God gives us
grief that is raw and lament for a different looking motherhood
tears unseen
sea, earth and sky on outings with my children
firsts - day of kindergarten
text messages of scripture received at moments in need
honest moments
kisses goodbye
8 year old son saying "you have a point there, mum"
hairdressing "therapy"
reminder of own suffering being miniscule in comparison to many
a million sparkles on the water
hugs from friends
red wine
wisdom and smiles of friends
rainbows
orange and copper leaves
ecclesiastes 7 - don't look back!
weekend approaching

Far From Home

It's raining out this morning and I'm gazing out in to the rain and my as my eyes travel, my heart and my mind also travel.  The distant shores of home seem very distant today.  I long to sit at the kitchen tables of home.  The hours of shared conversation and an outpouring of love, over the outpouring of tea.  There is something so comforting about that wan knowing smile of a friend when a problem shared, really does become a problem halved.  And a chocolate biscuit is all the sweeter when hand delivered by that friend with a chuckle... who needs diets?!  The chocolate biscuit reigns supreme at tea and talk time!  So I look through the rain as the steam from the cup cradled in my hands curls around me and I hope those friends are enjoying the hug of a comfy chair and hot tea too.  These friends offer me grace, relief and respite, becoming my shelter from the storms of life.  Today - I wish I was not so far from home.

Remember

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I remember lots of things about my childhood.  I remember a sister I clung to on the first day of school, but with whom I would fight ferociously at the drop of a hat.  I remember being in neighbours houses, playing on the carpet that smelled of "carpet fresh" newly vacuumed for the guests that would be due for coffee that day.  The smoke would curl in the air, as passive smoking had never been mentioned then, and these women, our mothers would coffee date their way through life.  Do we change that much?  Maybe the smoking part!  I remember my Great Grandmother showing me a love that was unrivalled.  Such fun to be had at her home!  Shouting down the hollow banister to each other that went round the corner which made it all the more exciting!  The hours she spent teaching me to read, to write when I was just 3 years old, the hugs, the stories, the games, the chocolate wafer biscuits and the fizzy blackcurrant.... oh the love!  I remember my Grandpa walking miles with me, along with all 5 cousins every Saturday without fail, come rain, shine or hail.  I remember the love, the unfailing, unending love that bound us together.  Not perfect love, but love was the glue of our family.  I remember that God loves us and His love is the glue of our family.

Relevant

Writing along with the Gypsy Mama this morning for 5-minute Friday.  Won't you join the fun? www.thegypsymama.com

I am sifting and sorting through "stuff" right now.  I've accumulated much throughout my life thus far it would seem and as I sift and sort I have to figure out what to keep, what to discard, what is relevant.  What is relevant to my life now.  The memories wrapped up in a box aren't really there at all, the cherishing goes on my heart.  This is true of the bigger picture too.  Sorting through the  "stuff" and trying to figure out what is relevant, serves only to give me peaceful time, where the Lord can whisper to my soul.  He waits as I wait on Him to help me sort the bigger picture and find out what is truly relevant for my life.  My pastor spoke this week and said if we're feeling tired, frazzled and overwhelmed with our lives then we need to pause and re-align ourselves with God's will.   For Jesus promises that His yolk is easy and His burden is light.  I find myself feeling those things, so now it's time to lay down my load and pick up as a servant to allow Him to use me for His will.  It is us - the things of relevance -  the instruments of God's will, mercy and  grace.

Beyond

Writing along with the Gypsy Mama this morning for 5 minute Friday.  The title is "Beyond" Won't you join in too www.thegypsymama.com


All this could just be beyond my wildest dreams.  If I don't think too much, analyze too much, worry too much, and just stop and rest a while, and simply be - this could all be my big audacious, heartfelt dream.  It is beyond my dreams to have my children wrap their love around me in their big hugs.  It is beyond my dreams that my marriage continues with a love and getting to know you more everyday, even 10 years on.  I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams with my surroundings in this great big shiny creation, with my home, my work, my family, my friends, but mostly just where I am with Him.  He has me planted where roots run deep, beyond the eye, where I want to seek His will everyday.  Scratch the surface and what's beyond?  A heart with gratitude for His grace.

Be still....

Be still.... there's a whisper in my heart to just be still.  But something shouts from every corner - wash me, clean me, tidy me, file me, make me, and the tenderest of read to me, play with me.  But still the pull is there to just be still - to just be and to know, truly know the truth that binds us to this life and the next.  Be still for that moment of clarity.  Be still for that moment of unconditional love.  Be still and know that I am God.  Be still and see the beauty unfold before me.  Be still and behold - yes - even amongst the crumbs on the counter, the dog hairs on the floor, the zillion lego pieces scattered in unlikely corners, the tumbling paperwork, the fretful baby.  Be still, and know.  Be still and accept.  Be still and trust.  Be still, cleave to Him, know Him, love Him and give thanks.

When is enough, enough?

There's a sigh rolling from deep within today.  It's the constant financial gymnastics, as I find myself in a season of monetary shortfall.  The juggle as we try to pay all the bills and still put food on the table seems too big today, and I find myself thinking about money.  But when is enough money, enough?  I look round at the lifestyle choices we've made that have landed us in this zone of difficulty, when an unforeseen job loss meant that I became the main breadwinner overnight, and suddenly there isn't enough to go round.  Enough - there is that word again.  This has been a difficult period of time for us, but one in which God has shaped us, moulded us, and shown us that what we need isn't the same as our human greed.   Today I think about whether we will continue to pay for the house, or lose our home, continue to buy food for the fridge, or go hungry this evening, buy new shoes for the children or wear summer crocs a while longer.  But scripture is clear on this - we cannot serve God and money.  I continue to pray for Him to strip away what isn't required and just to get my heart right with Him.  He knows my needs before I ask, so really do I have any needs at all?  There will be enough and it will be sufficient, just as He is sufficient and He is enough.  I trust Him to help me walk this valley, I have faith to wait on Him, and finally I see that my oh so comfortable lifestyle is simply idolatry packaged very prettily to make me feel comfortable.  Funny how uncomfortable I feel now, and all I long for is to simplify.  Gratitude for the grace, and all is grace. 

Catch

5 minute Friday means I get to write for just 5 minutes, uninterrupted and unedited.  This weeks topic is "Catch" Link to the Gypsy Mama, and join the fun!

Catch

I can never quite catch up…. with anything.  I am striving, but everything always seems just one step ahead.  I can’t get caught up on making dinner, the laundry, the children’s homework, that book I wanted to read, the dusting, vacuuming, the preparation to teach the children about Jesus this week.  Where’s the catch in catch up? I’m learning it’s not a series of check marks on a to-do list.  It’s simply having one moment at a time to make up one day, and one day is all I have.  One day is prepared for me, presented to me, and the opportunity is there to walk in unison with the Lord, accepting all He has to offer, right here, right now.  I’m glad I don’t have to do it alone.  I’m glad that He doesn’t mind that my house isn’t pristine, and that my house is slowly coming in to order as I am a work in progress – a bit like that to-do list.  So I’m catching up – learning to live His life for me, accepting the abundant Grace and Love on offer, just for today.